Perfectionism… In Daily Life / Something To Be Disappointed About [Ax2]

Perfectionism… In Daily Life

I’m a perfectionist. And I don’t care what you think about me.

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I really hate it when everything didn’t go according to plan. You know how tight I was when it comes to planning, especially if I’m aiming to accomplish whatever plans you have for that day. So I always make sure that it happens in my favor, otherwise, I’m gonna fly off the handle and switch from a nice guy to a rude critic in a second. You know how terrible I can get when I’m mad.

I’m pretty sure some of you are feeling the same, since you can be either demanding or have high standards when it comes to a variety of things, like services and/or products. Anyway, we all deserve something better, yet we don’t always get what we want. And it’s really frustrating.

Being the cranky person I was, I tend to raise my eyebrows when something goes wrong or they couldn’t provide me with anything I need. If I want to work on my attitude, then they must work hard on providing a better/excellent service to [un]satisfied consumers/customers like me.

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No matter how we try to do things perfectly, there are some flaws. For starters, there are some unexpected problems that may keep you from accomplishing a certain goal, especially under pressure. There are complications and difficulties in the process that can frustrate some people, not to mention that they always pay attention to the little details that they just keep on repeating the same task or process until they got it right.

For example, you are writing an article or a short story, something that requires editing for the sake of your observant readers. As you write some parts of the article or the story, you tend to edit some of the sentences or paragraphs just to make it look like it is professionally written. I tend to be like that at times, and that’s one of the reasons why it took me long enough to finish an article or a story. It’s just that I wanted to write something as it is, yet I always check what I’ve written for some unnoticeable mistakes. That’s how perfectionist I was, I can’t let some flaws showing up on a finished product.

In daily life, you wanted to make sure that you have everything in hand like you must have the necessary ingredients needed to prepare a certain dish. If this didn’t come out good, then I’ll be disappointed. If I have one thing missing, then I’ll be disappointed. You see, I just want things to go smoothly without any problems.

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Anyway, so here are some things that you can apply your perfectionism on:

  • Household chores–The cleaner, the better.
  • Cooking dishes–Depending on your preference, as long as it’s good.
  • Art projects–It’s purely aesthetic, to begin with, so a good presentation is a must.
  • Designs–Same as above.
  • Providing quality service(s) to consumers/customers–We deserve better.
  • Infrastructure projects–Some people don’t just settle for simple or badly-executed designs, they want anything more than just functionality.
  • Transportation–With the hellish traffic in Manila, we deserve a better way to get around the metropolis without a hassle. Never mind the transportation fare, not everyone cares about how expensive it will get for as long as they can get to their destination faster.
  • Your writings–As mentioned earlier, it’s for the sake of your observant readers.
  • Your outfits–If it doesn’t look good on you, don’t bother wearing it.
  • Everything you bought, in-store or online–Quality matters, especially if it’s a premium/expensive product. Definitely worth the price.
  • Scheduled tasks/plans–If it doesn’t go as expected, there’s the frustration of having to change plans at the last minute, which is definitely not my thing.
  • Your personal choices–Your personal taste rules, as well as your choices. They can recommend a lot of stuff but the choice is always yours… and you can assert your inner critic in you if they keep pushing you to take their word for it.

And there’s a lot more. It’ll be too much to write about, so that should do for now.

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Being a perfectionist in daily life may sound like having a demanding attitude towards everything. In the end, we deserve better. Don’t get me wrong on the “demanding” part. I mean we are all entitled to that kind of attitude, as long as you do it in a nice manner.

In regards to our expectations, we always make sure that we’re doing things as perfectly as possible. But there will always be inconsistencies and errors in the process. Yes, we can always proclaim that we’re perfect in some way… but really, nobody’s perfect.


Something To Be Disappointed About

We do get disappointed for a lot of reasons. We’re all expected to, especially when things go wrong with ourselves, with others, and with all the things that are happening in the world.

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The word disappoint is traced to the Middle English disappointen by way of the Old French desapointer.^ In literal meaning, it is to remove from office. Its use in the sense of general frustration traces to the late 15th century, and it first appears recorded in English as an emotional state of dejection in the middle 18th century.

Disappointment is a subjective response related to anticipated rewards.^ It is a form of sadness—a feeling of loss, an uncomfortable space (or a painful gap) between our expectations and reality.^ It happens when something unpleasant happens, in which the feeling of happiness is replaced by a feeling of sadness or frustration.

Recovering from a disappointment varies among people, ranging from a few minutes to a few days. While we can get over our disappointment, there’s a possibility of it recurring over time with the repetition of the same unpleasant incidents that lead you to this letdown.

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Broken promises, unfulfilled dreams, failures, unsatisfactory performances and actions, unfair practices, poor services… these are the things that we’re probably disappointed about. The feeling of sadness, anger, and frustration can lead to a thinking that there’s nothing we can do about it. Somehow, expressing our disappointment is the only way to let others know that there’s something wrong with the way things are.

The feeling of disappointment can affect your emotions, as well as your performance and your optimism. Just imagine how will you be able to redeem yourself when things go wrong and there are no other ways to get around this problem you’re having. You may be expecting something good with your plans, but there are times when you really need to be prepared for a sudden mishap, like an unexpected incident that will force you to change your plans at the last minute.

The feeling of disappointment isn’t limited to your own expectations or others’ actions. Sometimes, even a simple inconvenience can cause disappointment for some people too, like road traffic or some sudden cut-offs like train operations and telecommunication services. These things often come in an unexpected manner, and can even disrupt your mood.

I really hate the thought of feeling disappointed over a simple thing such as long lines or long waiting times, service interruptions, and unexpected changes. It’s just that I don’t like wasting a lot of time doing nothing while waiting for my turn or for the service(s) to go back to normal.

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Well then, here are some things to be disappointed for:

  • Others not meeting your standards/expectations
  • Inconveniences (long lines, long waiting times, heavy traffic, bad or terrible services)
  • Service interruptions
  • Betrayal
  • Political issues
  • Incompetent leaders, managers, and bosses
  • Distasteful and controversial remarks on certain issues
  • Unexpected failure(s)
  • Wasting a lot of time dealing with a difficult problem
  • Selfishness of others
  • Other people’s attitude
  • Getting scammed
  • Unexpected natural phenomenon (heavy rains, thunderstorms, floods, snowstorms)
  • Poor management
  • Sudden changes without prior notice

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Yes, we do get disappointed for some reason. It is a natural reaction to anything unpleasant or unexpected. But no matter how disappointed we are, we must never let ourselves dwell to this kind of thought for long.

Take a deep breath, relax, think of how to cope in this disappointing situation you are in. After all, you can’t afford to feel disappointed all the time.

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#2018: The Posts So Far… The Mid-Year Roundup

In the first half of this year, there are three notable events in my blogging career:

  • TWATKcox’s fifth year anniversary in the cyberspace (#TWATKcox5th)
  • My former blog Kin Keihan Times’ tenth year (Kin Keihan Times X)
  • My tenth year as a blogger

It sure was an achievement for me, even though I faced a lot of hurdles throughout my entire blogging life. And so, I’m looking forward to another milestone in my blogging career.

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Basically, I feature a list of some of the notable posts for the entire year in an annual year-end post. But due to a great number of posts published within a year (with the last year being the busiest), I had a hard time deciding which ones I should include on the annual list of notable posts, so I decided to feature some of the posts from January to June in the mid-year special, and the posts from July to December in the year-end special.

Well then, here are some of the selected posts from the first-half of 2018, in chronological order.

#2017: One Remarkable Year

A special post recounting the good (and bad) things that happened during that year. Some of the remarkable things that happened include the first time I attended an otaku event and the book fair. Even though the year 2017 didn’t end up replicating the best year of my life (the year 2005), it is still remarkable in its own way.

#TWATKcox5th: The Fifth Year Anniversary Special

The 200th post/5th year anniversary special is a review of TWATKcox’s first five years in the cyberspace. It also features some snippets from most of the blog’s posts within a five-year period.

Mornings, Alarms, And Waking Up

This post tells about the struggles of waking up early and providing tips from setting a sleep schedule to setting the alarm to a suitable time for those who have problems resetting their body clock.

#Throwback: KCOX, The Writer

This throwback post recounts my earlier experiences as a frustrated [story] writer. Perhaps this is where I share my fascination with writing dark-themed stories, as well as producing a lot of drafts that were never finished.

The Things I’ll Never Experience [E]

And here I was, lamenting about some things I never get to experience. From not attending the prom to a reunion with some of my friends/classmates, these are the things that are now impossible for me to experience now that it’s all over. I was having a quarter-life crisis back when I wrote this.

Age Is Nothing But A Curse: A Harsh Reality Check [E]

It is intended to be an angry post about growing up, but I ended up writing about the things that older people have to deal with, such as age-related discrimination, mingling with younger people, enjoying (and giving up) their childhood hobbies, and health problems. Of course, I still do provide a rant about the fact that I’m not getting any younger, possibly because there are some things I never get to do when I had the chance.

#Throwback: Lonely Fourth Grade

A throwback post about my lonely life as a fourth grader. It is during that time when I first experienced rejection from most of my classmates and the fact that I was feeling a little depressed since I only have a couple of friends to hang out with. It is one of the darkest moments of my childhood, but not to the point of pushing over the edge just because of a simple case of rejection.

A Digital Disaster: From Problem To Recovery

A special post that deals with hard drive failure, data recovery, and the importance of creating multiple backups of important files. I wrote this a couple of months after the old hard drive (which contained most of my mobile phone and smartphone photos, music, video, and document files) failed and some of the contents became corrupted and unreadable. It took me long enough to salvage most of the files from the failing hard drive, as well as taking some time off from blogging to focus on recovering the corrupted/damaged files.

The Kin Keihan Times, Year X (225th Post Special)

A special commemorative post for my former blog, the Kin Keihan Times. This is where I recount my earlier blogging experience, as well as my former blog’s history. It is the predecessor to my current blog, The World According To KCOX.

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And there you have it, these are some of the featured posts for the first-half of this year. Six months and thirty posts, that’s quite a lot. Anyway, there’s still six months left before the year ends, and there’s a lot of notable posts to look forward to.

Watch out for the second part featuring the posts from July to December on January 2019.

The Kin Keihan Times, Year X (225th Post Special)

Today marks the Kin Keihan Times‘ tenth year in the cyberspace. Even though the blog ended its run just as it was about to reach its fifth year more than five years ago, it still remains a part of my blogging life for it is the predecessor to The World According To KCOX.

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Back when I started the Kin Keihan Times, I was just starting college. Well, I couldn’t think of what to write for my debut post so I decided to copy and paste the entire About Me section of my Friendster profile. I don’t know if it’s a good idea to copy something from my own Friendster profile or some other websites since that may give the blog’s visitors (mostly friends) the impression that I don’t write original content, but what matters is that I introduced myself.

Of course, I’ve only just started blogging that time so I’m not yet used to this kind of life, but eventually, I was getting the hang of it. I find myself writing a few more posts which features some of my [past] experiences, and later, I started posting literary pieces. Prior to having an internet connection, I usually do the writing at home, then head to the nearest internet café, and upload it to my blog. I don’t usually pay attention to grammatical errors that time, I mean no matter how hard I try to make sure that my posts are easy to read and understand, only a few people will visit my blog anyway.

I initially hosted my blog on Friendster Blogs. It is automatically connected to my Friendster account so I wouldn’t have to worry about reaching out to my immediate audience–my friends. I can always say that I did a good job at maintaining my blog and I somehow connect to my immediate audience, but eventually, I need to reach out and attract a lot of potential audiences aside from my friends. So far, I don’t have any followers and my blog went unnoticed. Back then, I didn’t really care much about it, for as long as I can keep on posting new content whenever I have free time.

I never schedule my posts as I only write and post content when I’m not too busy with school activities. So I ended up posting about 40+ articles within a two-and-a-half year period. That’s okay since I’m not yet a serious blogger and my posts looked somewhat amateurish, with grammatical errors and some inconsistencies. I still need to improve.

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In May 2010, KKT on Blogger was launched, serving as the mirror site for my blog. It’s been around for a few months before I decided to shut it down and moved to WordPress. I then created a secondary blog, the KKT Literary Corner, to handle my literary posts. Of course, the original blog on Friendster Blogs is still operational until the following year. I also launched the blog’s Facebook page by year-end to promote some of my posts and regularly update my followers on some upcoming posts.

In June 2011, Friendster, along with its blogging service, bid farewell. By that time, the KKT had already reached its third year. Since Friendster’s demise, I decided to revamp the KKT’s WordPress site so I can turn it into my primary blog. The original blog’s contents are then transferred to WordPress under the name The Original Kin Keihan Times a.k.a the KKT Archives, which still exists as of June 2018. And in September 2011, the spin-off to the KKT, The World According To KCOX on Tumblr, was launched. This is where I post some updates regarding KKT’s upcoming posts and some important announcements, as well as a whole bunch of comical nonsense.

I then keep on writing new posts and keep searching for ideas for my upcoming posts. It was around this time when I was currently working on the Timeline series. The first eleven posts, which were originally published on the KKT, were eventually reposted to my new blog, TWATKcox.

In the end, I was thinking of shutting down the blog and start a new one. And so, after four years and seven months, the KKT bid farewell and TWATKcox-WP began operations the following day. All of the posts from the main blog, the Literary Corner and its Tumblr spin-off were all moved to the KKT Archives, and its Facebook page was rebranded to its current incarnation as TWATKcox’s Facebook page. Meanwhile, the Tumblr page now serves as TWATKcox-WP’s mirror site. It is where I post updates on my upcoming posts as well as exclusive content.

It’s all over for KKT. May the blog that I worked on since college remain in the hearts and minds of a handful of followers.

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For more than four and a half years, the KKT was a representation of my early career as a blogger and the posts simply become a record of my early experience in blogging/writing articles and literary works. Just reading some of them makes me wonder how come I’ve written that kind of [embarrassing] stuff. But it gives me the feeling of nostalgia too, along with my college memories and some inspiration from a lot of things. I made it this far by means of practice… even though no one ever reads my blog posts.

―from Remembering The Kin Keihan Times (The 125th Post)

Four years and seven months. The posts from all of the blog’s incarnations and its spin-offs are compiled and migrated to the archives. Some of these posts are reposted on TWATKcox, including the Timeline series posts. I have plans to revive the Literaryfest on TWATKcox-Tumblr later this year, while a couple of literary posts will be rewritten and reposted on TWATKcox-WP the following year. Right now, the KKT Archives is no longer maintained but will remain on the blogosphere for the sake of posterity.

The World According To KCOX now serves as my primary blog, featuring mostly my experiences ideas, thoughts, interests, and helpful reminders and tips on various things or situations. I still write and publish some of my literary pieces on this blog, but on a sporadic basis. Some of the posts are written in a similar fashion to my former blog, but with some improvements.

I still visit the KKT Archives every once in a while and read some of my old posts. They’re not that good, but they’re not that bad either. Regardless, they’re part of my blogging history and will always be.


Come to think of it, I’ve already reached my tenth year in the blogging world. It is through my undying determination that I actually made it this far.

Well, it was quite an experience for a dedicated blogger like me despite the countless hurdles I encountered along the way. Ten years is enough to make a nice impression that I blog for such a long time, and I (and my writing) somehow improved through time. For now, I consider blogging as a hobby, but there’s a chance that I might turn this so-called hobby into a profession… someday.

A Digital Disaster: From Problem To Recovery

On the night following my last mall-hopping trip mid-April, I was about to transfer some of the photos to the old hard drive on my PC when I suddenly noticed that there was something wrong with one of the folders. I tried to click on it and I was horrified to know that the folder is already corrupted. I then freaked out and called my brother who was in the room to tell him that there’s something going on with the old hard drive. He came to check what’s happening and sure enough, there was something wrong with the old hard drive.

He went back inside the room and handed me the external hard drive so I can copy some of the files that I can salvage from the failing hard drive. But it was a tiring and stressful process, not to mention slow and extremely time-consuming. For the next few days, I was dealing with recovering some of the corrupted files on the drive, including my cherished smartphone pics and some music and video files.

Eventually, I was able to recover most of the files. Unfortunately, some of the image files (mostly JPGs and PNGs) are damaged, but at least I was able to retrieve my otherwise lost smartphone pics. Everything went well, except that there’s no space in the new hard drive, where the OS was installed. So the files will have to remain on the external hard drive for the time being.

This incident may prove to be disastrous if you’re totally unprepared for it. Just imagine the distress I’ve gone through in recovering these files.

Understanding Hard Drive Failure And Data Loss

The hard drive is one of the most common data storage devices for computers. Hard drives currently available in the market today have the storage capacity ranging from 500 gigabytes to about 6 terabytes. Of course, the higher the capacity, the more files you can store in a single hard drive… and of course, more expensive.

But no matter how small or large the hard drive’s capacity is, they only have an average lifespan of five years since some mechanical parts wear out. In addition, there are certain factors which may lead to hard drive failure including extreme factors (such as fire and water damage), exposure to high magnetic fields, and suffering a sharp impact or environmental contamination leading to head crash.^

Hard drive failure occurs when a hard disk drive malfunctions and any stored data in it cannot be accessed with a properly configured computer. It may happen during normal usage or prematurely due to reasons aforementioned.

So in case you’re trying to access something on your hard drive but it shows an error message preventing you from accessing the folder or the file, then chances are your file is corrupted and unreadable. Also, if you try to boot your PC, Scandisk or CHKDSK may run to check your drive for errors, which will usually take a longer time to finish depending on how much bad sectors your drive has.

Data loss is an error condition in the information system in which information is destroyed by failures or neglect in storage, transmission, or processing.^ Data loss isn’t just all about losing data to a failing hard drive. Sometimes, malware or computer viruses may wipe all your data out, rendering them corrupted or inaccessible.

Signs Of A Failing Hard Drive^^

  • Strange clicking or humming noises coming from the hard drive
  • Repeated program crashes or errors
  • Files or folders took long to read/load
  • Corrupted data
  • Accumulation of bad sectors

In Case Of A Failing Hard Drive

In case something inevitable happens, try to diagnose the problem first to see whether the problem is in the hard drive itself or the connecting cables. Sometimes, it could be a virus or malware that corrupts the files. But if your hard drive is more or less five years old, then there’s a possibility that it will ultimately give up due to some mechanical parts wearing out.

If that’s the case, then try to recover as much data as possible. You can use data backup software to copy the files to your backup drive, preferably removable storage media. You can also use data recovery software or send your hard drive to a data recovery service, but there’s no guarantee that all of the affected files on the failing hard drive will be recovered.

How To Avoid The Inevitable Hard Disk Drive Failure And Data Loss

Back up your files often, especially the more important ones such as documents, pictures, and anything you consider valuable. There are a lot of storage options available, mostly optical drives or removable drives. There’s also cloud-based storage which offers about 5 to 15 gigabytes of free storage allowance, though you’ll have to pay if you need more than that.

Take good care of your hard drive by keeping it away from magnets and static electricity, avoiding exposure to dust and other elements, avoiding impact, keeping it ventilated, and checking the disk for errors. These can prolong the lifespan of your hard drive and keep your files safe from corruption.

Conclusion

Right now, the old hard drive is disconnected from the PC and the files are saved on the external hard drive. There are plans to buy a new hard drive, but that would have to wait, unfortunately.

This is not the first time we encountered this problem. A few years ago, I just noticed that there’s something wrong with the hard drive and told my brother about it. Luckily, we were able to backup everything to a new drive, the same drive that was about to give up soon. This time, however, it was a little too late for us to backup everything.

So far, I managed to rescue most of the files, and the rest are either no longer recoverable or just a bunch of redundant junk that should be left behind. I was hoping that I can have access to these files without the need to plug in the external hard drive everytime I need something.

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Since that unfortunate incident, I was still feeling anxious about the fact that I still lose some of the files to a failing hard drive. This should really teach us a lesson on the importance of keeping backups of the most important files, especially the ones that are truly irreplaceable. Sometimes, it really pays to have multiple copies of your most valuable files, no matter how redundant it is.

Always remember to back up your files and don’t ignore the warning signs of a failing hard drive. Don’t wait for your hard drive to give up on you before you even start doing a backup of your precious files.

Age Is Nothing But A Curse: A Harsh Reality Check [E]

Let’s face it, age doesn’t really matter but only if they don’t actually pay attention to it.

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You see, there are cases where age is seen as a basis for most types of application, particularly contests and job hiring. The younger, the better. I don’t understand why they always pay attention to this kind of bullshit when there are a growing number of people who are unemployed and more qualified than the first-timers? Perhaps they thought that overaged applicants can no longer keep up with the younger generation. Actually, the younger ones are no match for the veterans when it comes to experience. Well, the veterans do orient the younger ones on various things, serving as a trainer. But then, are they gonna stay long in the company? No, because some companies believe that they’re no longer fit to work in an environment of mostly young people. Sad, isn’t it?

It sucks that you can never turn back the clock and remain young forever. It sucks to grow old and lose the charm you once had. It sucks to grow old and develop health problems later on. It sucks to be singled out of the group just because you’re far too older than the rest of the people. It sucks that no matter how many cosmetic procedures you’ve gone through, you can never escape aging. Life sucks, I’ll have you that. So is growing old really something to be thankful for, despite the fact that you’re gonna suffer that you’d rather die-while-you-still-have-the-chance instead? It depends on the person.

No matter how you try to keep yourself many years younger, you can’t escape aging. So it’s either you move on with it or die right now.

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So here are the situations where age is considered a curse by me:

  • Hanging out with younger people–Being the oldest person in the group isn’t at all bad, but it’s not something to be happy about either. Depending on the age gap, there’s a possibility that the oldest person in the group would feel awkward among the rest of the group.
  • Job applications–The younger the applicant, the more chance he/she will be hired. It’s just a matter of discrimination regarding an applicant’s age. Take note that this only applies to certain jobs which don’t involve machinery or seriously difficult labor.
  • Responsibility–The older you’ll get, the more responsibility you’ll take. Care to have a few adulting lessons in order for you to be prepared for a more challenging life ahead, the one involving paying the bills, budgeting your expenses, and starting a family? Bet some of you will cringe at the thought of this possibility.
  • Looking good–The older you’ll get, the more you’ll run out of suitable outfit choices unless you’re a woman. So whatever clothing you’re wearing right now may no longer look good on you once you grow old. And even though you look young, age can still be a turn-off factor for some people, who will always believe that a particular piece of clothing or outfit is only suitable for a person of a certain age group.
  • Giving up your childhood/teenage hobbies and interests–This is the most difficult part of growing up–letting go of your childhood hobbies. As you can see, these are the main reason why we continue living. So can you expect a 40-year-old otaku to stop watching anime shows just because they’re too old for that sort of thing? If I were that 40-year-old, I’m not willing to give that up, not without a fight anyway.
  • Enjoying the things you used to do–I used to enjoy gaming back when I was a teen. Nowadays, I don’t feel like doing it… well, I still do gaming but on a sporadic basis. Also, at this age, I should be focusing on my career and not with my friends… wait, do I have one? Seriously, it does feel awkward for an adult to be playing a handheld video game out in the open. This sucks, isn’t it?
  • Health conditions–By the time you reach 50, health problems are bound to come, though this is now irrelevant due to the fact that young people are at risk of developing heart diseases, high blood pressure, diabetes, and other serious illnesses due to their unhealthy lifestyle. Still, this is one thing to worry about once you reach that age, no matter how healthy you are.
  • Changes in your body–Your age may have nothing to do with how you look right now, but you can’t hide the fact that you’re growing older. After all, your birth date never lies. Well, no one actually told me how young I looked, but I’m pretty sure that my age is clearly showing for two reasons: there are traces of facial hair on my face even though I shaved thoroughly, and I started slowing down and feeling lethargic at times. Yes, I’m already 27 and I feel like this seems to be a pretty normal case for an adult. Not good.
  • Moving out and retirement–In some countries, a child is expected to move out of their parents’ house by the time they reach 18 in order for them to live independently. In the workplace, a person is expected to retire by the time they reach 60 or older. It’s pretty much a source of separation anxiety for those who wanted to continue living with their parents and those who wanted to continue working to support themselves or their families, and age is said to be blamed for the anxiety they experienced.

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Now then, who wants to grow up? Well, only the optimistic ones do. And that, [un]fortunately, does not include me.

Oh well, life really is a never-ending journey full of experiences and unexpected surprises. Guess it will do good if I just stop thinking about my own age and focus on the things that I really enjoy then?

Age is just a number, that’s for sure. It’s up to you to keep misleading them with your youthful looks or actions and get away with it. Oh well, this is one thing I should never fuss about. Anyway, I’m still young… depending on how I feel right now.

#TWATKcox5th: The Fifth Anniversary Special Post

January 26, 2018… the day TWATKcox reached its fifth year in the cyberspace. It’s amazing how I managed to get this far, despite the struggles of having writer’s block and the tendency to procrastinate while I’m striving to finish what I’m writing. Oh boy, this is what I call an achievement!

All right, so let’s have a review of the first five years of TWATKcox, and how I managed to get this far. Also included in this special post are the snippets from some of my posts.

The Kin Keihan Times 2.0

Some of the posts are written in a similar fashion to my former blog The Kin Keihan Times. Back then, my posts always tell something about me and my miserable past. Though it is really a good thing at first to write something about myself and revisit your past, it just gets embarrassing to revisit years later. Anyway, I’m still drawn to writing about my [miserable] past from time to time, but I don’t just deal with my elementary and high school life, but also some parts of my personal life in general.

Of course, I also wrote some meaningful posts on the blog as well, such as No, Never, And I Don’t Like, My World Online, and the first 11 posts in the Timeline Series. These were eventually re-posted on TWATKcox.

The Lighter Side Of Life

Some of the lighter posts deal primarily with my interests and obsessions. I always love blogging about my interests, especially if it’s all about the things I love, such as food, music, fashion, and travel.

The Darker Side Of Life

Of course, there are times when I really need to express the emotional side of me. You know, stuff like missed chances, bad experiences, and depressing moments. Aside from that, I also tackled some sensitive topics such as depression, bullying, and suicide, which is more of raising awareness while sharing some of my experiences regarding the ones mentioned.

The Story Of My Life

The Timeline Series, which generally focuses on my high school and college life, makes up most of the posts that tell the story of my life. Other than that, there are some posts that focus on the dark side of my life, as well as the misery I experienced at school… and probably hatred towards a certain group of people.

A Series Of Posts

Aside from the Timeline Series, there’s the Obsessions (general interest), The Listening Room (music and radio), In 150 Words (short but somewhat informative posts), and the #Throwback Series (the story behind a particular remarkable memory). Some of the shorter series that end their run after a handful of posts belong to TWATKcox Specials. So far, it’s The Summer Series that had its posts included in the category.

On The Tumblr Side Of The Story

In addition to the main WordPress site, there’s the Tumblr site which serves as a mirror site for TWATKcox-WP, as well as a hub for extras, updates, opinions, and personal posts. It also serves as the home to The Keihancarl Diaries, which primarily features my city travels, notable experiences, and some sightings, and TWATKRant, which deals with my pessimistic, emotional, and not-so-friendly outbursts in writing.

Right now, I’m planning to expand the Tumblr site with a couple of segments, one of them is The Anime Diaries, which is set to premiere (tentatively) this May. Anyway, TWATK-Tumblr serves as the more explicit version of the main blog, at least due to the TWATKRant posts.

A Wide Range Of Topics… Except For A Few

This blog features a lot of informative posts, ranging from common interests, hobbies, online, travel, fashion, and a person’s well-being, among others. While I cover some sensitive topics like the ones mentioned on the Darker Side Of Life segment of this post, I don’t generally feature political, religious, and sexual related topics on this blog as I find them too taboo to write about. Well, that may change, as soon as I’m confident enough to deal with it.

The Literary Side Of The Story

Unlike its predecessor The Kin Keihan Times, TWATKcox rarely features any of my own literary works. The only ones featured as of this writing are the eight poems (the first one, (For Mom) is a repost from KKT, the second one (This Silent Darkness) is the only original standalone poem for TWATKcox, and the six others were compiled and featured in a special literary post Expressions, In Light And Dark), a limerick (which is actually a test post that I forgot to delete after publishing TWATKcox’s debut/3rd post) and a couple of stories (an excerpt from my first novella Season Of Darkness and a short story featured in my first Literary+Article post). I was more focused on writing about my personal experiences and informative posts rather than writing short stories and poems.

The Year-End And Anniversary Posts

Yup, I always make sure that I feature a special post for every kind of achievement. Like, when TWATKcox reached 25th post, first year anniversary, 50th post, third year anniversary, 100th post, fifth year anniversary, 250th post, and so on. Also, it’s a yearly tradition for this blog to feature a list of some of the notable articles published within a certain period for the year-end post, as a way of looking back at what I’ve posted during that time.

The Gallery Of Edited Pictures

I actually come up with a visual art gallery concept called The Quirk Concept back in 2014, though it initially featured some of my selfies and edited pics taken using a digital camera and a variety of mobile phones (from Nokia 2680-s to LG Optimus L3 II). Eventually, it includes some artistically edited photos (not the selfie ones) taken in various locations. Though it remained dormant for quite some time, it was then revived last October and is still featuring a mix of unedited and edited photos.


All right, so I’ve written nearly 200 posts and right now there are a lot more waiting to be written and published. Sounds like I’m gonna get busy this year, huh?

As mentioned earlier, my blog posts generally consist of informative posts as well as some of my past experiences. I may have lots of ideas in mind, but then there are some challenges that make me lose focus on my intended work. It certainly takes a great amount of time to finish a simple post, but there are times when I can actually finish a post within a few hours. In other words, I can only write when I feel like it.

Five years and I somehow managed to get this far despite the difficulties. I guess it’s my undying determination and perseverance that keeps this blog going. There are times when I feel like giving up writing a lot of posts for this blog, but that actually means abandoning it altogether. Yes, writing is my passion, and I’m polishing my craft by means of blogging in order to be a better writer someday.

Anyway, here are some meaningful snippets from some of my posts.

  • Sometimes, being yourself is just plain boring. At times you wanted to look like somebody else, only that would make you feel ambitious about yourself. [Your Virtual Alter Ego, March 2013]
  • Why would I consider going places like a maze? It is actually more of discovering places and paths, but there are times that in order to go there, you should walk along the streets, trying to guess which way is the right way. Lots of directions and more twists and turns… it’s getting confusing sometimes. [Like A Maze, (On Directions And Road Maps), May 2013]
  • A lot of memories created, a lot of fun posted… they may be here now but not tomorrow. [It’s Me Before Facebook: Great Sites Missed, August 2013]
  • Grown-ups constantly argue with their parents over the choice of clothes, whether it’s comfy or not, revealing, layered (meaning wearing one garment over the other), monotone (wearing everything of the same color)… it’s like violating their right to express themselves through fashion. [The Art Of Looking Good, KCOX Style, August 2013]
  • As the story progresses, so does the writer’s block. I could think of a better idea for the story, but then it would get off my mind and I’m back to thinking wonderful, forgotten ideas to incorporate into the story. It took me quite a long time… [The Downsides In Threes, August 2013]
  • Looking back, it was extremely painful to experience being excluded from the group. I only rely on myself, and I find happiness in what I have. [The Story Of My Life: How It Begin And How It Affects Me, September 2013]
  • Just as you strive for the best, being a perfectionist would mean that you are truly ambitious and would always make sure that you get to appreciate the finest of your creation. [Perfectionist Ideals, September 2013]
  • But then, am I really lost in this colorful world? Absolutely not 100%. I’m still trying to get over it, and I’m still working on it. [In Black And Gray… Uncertainties And Anxieties, December 2013]
  • So when does drinking tea becomes an obsession? Well, I’m no coffee drinker, and I don’t like the taste of coffee especially without cream or milk. Tea is milder in taste, and it was soothing so it’s a perfect alternative if I need caffeine. [Obsessions: Tea, May 2014]
  • There are lots of memories. But not all of them exists in mind anymore… [A Long Forgotten Nostalgia, June 2014]
  • I learned to appreciate darkness and escapism. It’s hard to snap out of it, by the way. [About My Life, How Do I Look At It?, June 2014]
  • I have lots of ideas in mind, yet I tend to forget some of it. [Ideas Coming From Me, Keihancarl, June 2014]
  • Now I’m beginning to understand why it’s hard to be self-reliant. I failed to see the better benefits of a friendship. [A Certified Commoner, July 2014]
  • Maybe they thought it’s uncommon for them to see someone wearing a khaki coat with matching red scarf, which by the way is one of my signature outfits, and they have certain misconceptions about that person whether he is really weird or he is from another country. For me, it’s called preference. [Obsessions: Weird Fashion, August 2014]
  • Just hearing the word suicide haunts me up to this day, coupled with palpitations. In fact, I tried to avoid using that word especially in the stories I’m writing (despite the fact that the stories I wrote are dark-themed and explicit). In the end, it’s important to at least remind the people how valuable life is. [Dying To End It All, August 2014]
  • All these bad memories of my past will soon be forgotten… but then, am I really forgetting anything? [Friendship And Memories: The Story Of A Transferee, October 2014]
  • Identity. It’s something that we all have, and we always have. Without it, we are nothing. [You, As Yourself (A Matter Of Identity), December 2014]
  • For me, drawing isn’t just a hobby or an activity, but it’s an expression of your own visual interpretation. [Obsessions: Drawing, January 2015]
  • Also, they would ask why I was quiet most of the time. It’s not like I’m avoiding conversations, but this is getting on my nerves just being asked that. [When Silence Isn’t Golden, March 2015]
  • Sometimes, the only way for people to take you seriously is to be above them at all times. You act as if you’re the boss, somewhat cranky and imposing. [What It Means To Be Superior?, March 2015]
  • Technically, we only have the rainy season and the dry season as I’m living in a tropical country. Summer, so they say, is only for countries with four seasons. But then, I’m using it just the same. [Once Upon A Dreamy Summer, April 2015]
  • The colors red and black suggests courage and formality, respectively. Other than these characteristics, I simply decided that these two colors always match one another, a very strong combination indeed. [Obsessions: Red And Black, April 2015]
  • Every person is creative. And when we say creative, we got more than just ideas and concepts… it’s something we actually do in the process. [When Creativity Strikes, April 2015]
  • You are what you listen to. For music lovers, their choice of music defines their lifestyle. [The Listening Room: Choice Of Music, April 2015]
  • I don’t limit myself to writing unusually dark and depressing stories. In fact, I can write stories involving comedy and romance. But then, I’m more into writing stories featuring serious and dramatic content, at times incorporating dark elements in these stories just because they seem more realistic. I mean, I’m not that cheesy enough to write romantic stories, and I can’t make people laugh hard enough to write funny stories. [The 100th Post: The Darker Side Of The Story–With A Depressing Plot, May 2015]
  • It may sound a bit too dark, but an all-black outfit can be really nice too. [The Ideal All-Black Fashion / What’s Inside The Bag?, June 2015]
  • Honestly, some people don’t care much about what I’m missing, for as long as they enjoy what they gained–friendships, relationships, a brief moment of popularity and all the fun they can have. [What I’m Missing Out…, June 2015]
  • Fast [and reliable] service? Sure, everybody would love that. But when fast isn’t really fast enough, you might say that they’re misleading a lot of people into expecting a better and faster service… [When Patience Is No Longer A Virtue, July 2015]
  • Ever wonder what makes cooking a messy business? It’s probably stress. Or maybe the lack of space on the kitchen countertop. Maybe the ingredients? [Cooking Is A Messy But Rewarding Business, October 2015]
  • Your mind is good at convincing you that every food served on the table is delicious, and this will prompt you to get more than what you can eat. [The Unhealthy Holiday Feast, January 2016]
  • You get pushed down for no reason. That’s not good. They had a handful of ugly names to call you. That’s not funny. And they plotted something against you… That’s not right. All of this came with a compromise… you can’t fight back. That’s not fair. [Of Force, Threat, And Coercion, January 2016]
  • Video games may be the best way to kill some time off, especially when you need to take a break from childhood stress. [Obsessions: Video Games (Except RPGs), February 2016]
  • Well, there are times you get carried away by stuffing your mouth… bite, after bite, after bite. [Everything On A Plate, But…, March 2016]
  • Something urged me to express myself through writing and I started blogging. [Remembering The Kin Keihan Times (The 125th Post), June 2016]
  • You don’t have to go full blast with the change, especially if you’re not fond of a major disruption in your daily routine/your weekly plans. [Adapting To Changes, September 2016]
  • Some people would tell me how unusual I was for not having a crush, but do I really care about that? [High School: A Memory Recall, September 2016]
  • My fascination with all-black really means something to me, and I know some of you are feeling the same way. [#Throwback: The Noir Project, October 2016]
  • A wardrobe defines a person’s personality. It depends on what clothes you have or what clothes you wear. [My Ideal Wardrobe, October 2016]
  • Happiness is like sunshine, it brightens up your day. Sadness is like rainfall, it makes your day gloomy. More of comparing life to a weather. It can be unpredictable, more of unavoidable. [The Extremely Pessimistic Self / The Sad State Of Life, October 2016]
  • I sure know how to deal with old, broken and unused stuff. For the past few years, these items took up a significant amount of space in my room. Well, having discarded such items, there’s a sense of relief that I can breathe comfortably. [What I Keep Is What I Cherish (Valuable Collections And Anything Worth Keeping), November 2016]
  • Yes, the world is full of harsh realities, and people are not the same as before. The word “sorry” is not in the vocabulary, and that’s an issue I’d like to address. [#Unapologetic, November 2016]
  • Memories are meant to be cherished, not forgotten. It’s a personal story, a part of your personal history that you can always look back to. [Memories… Moments, December 2016]
  • Okay, so I’m obsessed with the color black that I feel like wearing all-black at times. It just shows how dull can I be, but who cares if I look dull in that monotonous outfit? [Obsessions: Everything All-Black, December 2016]
  • Yes, my future is a real life struggle and I couldn’t do anything about it, blame it on my lack of motivation. [The Ongoing Internship And More… Timeline College Series #16, January 2017]
  • When you blog, you contribute a piece of your own history as well as your views about anything in general. [Why I Blog: The TWATKcox’s 4th Year Special, January 2017]
  • Sometimes, light does not provide the necessary comfort a person needs, and a person doesn’t need light in order to feel comfortable in whatever situation they’re in. [Fascination With Night And Darkness, February 2017]
  • Right now, I’m hiding in the shadows and live the unsocial life of an uncommunicative loner. I’m comfortable with it… but at times I feel a little awkward too… [Comfort Through Darkness (A Thought), March 2017]
  • We all have our expectations. There’s nothing wrong with it… unless we expect too much for an impossible thing to happen. [i150W: Expectations, March 2017]
  • I feel like I’m different from the rest of the bunch, not that I refuse to be one of them. It’s just that I want to follow my own trend. [My Quirky Ways, May 2017]
  • Fantasies, dreams, and anything make-believe… these are common to children with a high level of imagination. Of course, they tend to overdo it at times… [Fantasies, In Real Life, May 2017]
  • We all have our awkward experiences, and some of them are really embarrassing that we don’t want any part of it to be brought up. [Awkwardness Is…, June 2017]
  • Just imagine getting stuck in a so-called parking lot in the middle of the road, complete with the sight of red lights and the sound of vehicle horns… enough to keep you frustrated on the road. [i150W: Traffic, July 2017]
  • To be honest, school is actually a great place to learn and make friends. Yeah, why am I even thinking of ditching the thought of going to school when there is fun in learning? [School Days: My Thoughts About School And The Importance Of Education, July 2017]
  • Yes, I’m being nice. But I can be critical and straightforward. depending on the situation. [The Writer With An Attitude (The 175th Post Special), August 2017]
  • There are some things to be ungrateful about, and some things to despise about. It’s a cruel life, after all. [A Grudge Caused By A Miserable Past, August 2017]
  • That moment… it was kind of exciting and awkward at the same time. But then, I feel attached to the place where my high school is, so why should I feel awkward about it? [#Throwback: Lagro Revisited, August 2017]
  • All right, so I think there are some cases wherein I don’t feel good when I’m wearing an all-black outfit. [The Dangers Of Wearing All-Black, September 2017]
  • There are times when you’re too much focused on your work that you tend to forget your physical and emotional needs. [A Balanced Life, October 2017]
  • The struggle of having to work at night is real. It’s more than just trying to keep yourself awake and drinking coffee to combat sleepiness, as well as dealing with a lot of stress and some dangers. [Night Shift, October 2017]
  • Just thinking about my problems in life make me feel nervous and demotivated, at times depressed. It’s as if something’s torturing my mind with some kind of emotional stress that would make my life miserable. [The Dangers Of Anxiety, November 2017]
  • We tend to interpret a lot of things that come to our mind, and some of them proved to be crucial in producing ideas and making decisions. [The Thoughts Of A Person, November 2017]
  • Well, as you can see, I was trying to be a normal person, but I’m struggling to lure myself out of this situation. [Pretty Normal… Not!, December 2017]
  • There’s always a good reason to spend a lot of money on something you love or desire, but then you might go broke if you don’t know how to control your spending habits. [The Disadvantages Of Spending…, December 2017]
  • The real world is pretty boring in general. No strange looking scenery, no lush greenery, no dreamy feeling… and worst of all, absolutely no weird feelings about the places you’ve been. [The Alternate (Virtual/Imaginary) Universe, January 2018]

In the first five years of TWATKcox, I already tackled a lot of topics and featured most of my life stories and experiences. It’s amazing how I managed to get this far, but I’m sure this is only just the beginning. The blogging journey continues with lots of informative posts and literary works waiting to be written and published on this site. Yup, it is a never-ending journey for me, Keihancarl, and I enjoy every bit of it, despite some difficulties.

To all the followers and visitors of this blog, thank you for the support! Thank you for taking time to read everything I’ve written on this blog and for showing appreciation to my not-so-perfect posts. I hope you’ll keep coming back to this blog more often!

Happy fifth anniversary, TWATKcox! May this be a remarkable year for me and my blog. And I’m about to celebrate my tenth year as a blogger in a few months. Please look forward to it!

#2017: One Remarkable Year [E]

Well, a lot of remarkable things happened this year and for that, I’m extremely pleased. Except for a few stormy moments (mostly personal), everything went well.

Come to think of it, this year is remarkable in its own way. Just imagine how impressed I was with some of the good things that happened this year, especially from March and September.

January

The year begins with a post-New Year’s celebration. Of course, we managed to finish every leftover from the New Year’s Eve feast. I bought a couple of items, such as the digital alarm clock and the black knitted vest.

It was around this time when I finally get to witness the Dragon Dance at Ongpin Street in Binondo, but it was raining that time and I was exhausted from the crowd of people in the area. I decided to make a turn midway through the Dragon Dance, and head to the nearest mall. Before that, I also get to check the historic buildings at Escolta for the second time.

February

I just keep going back to the milk tea shop in Lagro, taking a moment to check the area and enjoy a nice sip of milk tea. Of course, I started wearing the black knitted vest and started experimenting with the string ribbon tie. Nothing special, it’s just that I might want to try it out.

March

I made three purchases this month. First, I bought the black cardigan. Next, I bought the black knitted blazer, but I didn’t wear it until my 27th birthday later that year. And of course, the black fleece coat that serves as a possible replacement for the black woolen coat that I bought a few years ago.

Around this time, I’ve been downloading some anime shows and a lot of music. I’m quite fascinated with a few anime characters, and I’m feeling kind of ecstatic about going out on a mall-hopping trip.

And then there’s a little mishap on the way home from a mall-hopping trip (where I bought another Tokyo Ghoul shirt from a stall in Binondo). First, there was a little accident where a jeepney hit the door of a UV Express I was riding. Apparently, a passenger was getting off that time, but it was a little off the sidewalk. And then a jeepney was passing through, but it just passed between the UV Express and the sidewalk while the door is still open. Result? A little accident. And while waiting for another UV Express, I can’t find my phone. After a few stressful minutes trying to find it, I actually misplaced it inside my bag. And that’s how that stressful moment ends.

And there goes the IV-Chromium gang again, trying to annoy me with some kind of messages through Facebook Messenger. They were planning a reunion that time, and some of them are talking about it. Apparently, they missed me a lot, but I hate them so much (even after ten years) that I was thinking twice about going out on the day of the reunion. Well, I did go out on that day, though I’m not actually planning to meet them anyway. Whatever.

April

April Fools’ Day. So here I was, minding my own business when two of my classmates from IV-Chromium approached me. They asked if I still remember them. Of course, I acted like I didn’t know them and walked away. I checked my Facebook Messenger, and they’re acting sad about it. As if they really cared about me anyway.

So I was really having a great time for the rest of the month. While on a mall-hopping trip to SM Masinag, I actually get to see the newly built piers of the LRT-2 East Extension. The rail tracks and power supply are yet to be installed, and the stations are yet to be built. Looks like we’ll have to wait a couple of years for the extension to be operational, eh?

May

I just happened to see a poster for an upcoming otaku event at the Fairview Terraces. I suddenly become interested in attending the event and even checked the venue for two weeks and checked the mall’s Facebook page. My excitement grew at the thought of it, as this will be the first time I’ll be attending an otaku event.

And there I was, admiring the cosplayers and their amazing costumes. I even had a few pictures with some of them. They’re really awesome. The two-day event is truly a memorable experience for me. I’m looking forward to a similar event, hopefully at the same venue. The event inspired me to start a new series on TWATK-Tumblr called The Keihancarl Diaries, which documents some remarkable things that happened during my trips.

The following week, I went on a mall-hopping trip to Bonifacio Global City (BGC) and McKinley Hill, both in Taguig. But the recent news updates about a terrorist group invading Marawi City suddenly made me feel anxious and as a result, I didn’t get to enjoy the trip too much due to anxiety. Even with the tightened security in Manila and other cities, I still couldn’t help but worry about the possibility of some terrorist groups slipping past the security. We’re praying for our safety and for our beloved soldiers who are fighting to restore peace and order in the affected city.

June

We tried roasting a whole chicken on the turbo broiler… it was okay. Well, the problem is that there’s a problem with the timer dial so we had to closely guard the chicken, like, for more than an hour. It turned out dry in the end, but we managed to enjoy the meal.

I visited Manila again after a few months. While running to catch the LRT-1 to Baclaran, I had an allergy attack and I felt very uncomfortable throughout the train ride. Later that afternoon, I enjoyed walking along the streets of Ongpin, and just witnessed an incident near the LRT Carriedo Station. And since it was raining that afternoon, I skipped Baywalk and head straight to Robinsons Place Manila to have an early dinner before heading home. That time, my former blog The Kin Keihan Times had just celebrated its ninth year in the cyberspace, though the site itself is now an archive of posts from all of my old blog sites, including TWATKcox-Tumblr’s early posts.

July

I published the two-part School Days article, which tells much about my elementary and high school life, as well as the importance of education.

On my next mall-hopping trip to Ortigas Center-Kapitolyo area, I visited Estancia Mall and the newly-opened Ayala Malls The 30th for the first time. Heading to SM Megamall, I saw some cosplayers and otaku fans gather outside the mall’s Trade Hall. There was actually an otaku event, but I didn’t have time to check it out since I still need to visit a few more malls in the area, as well as Greenhills Shopping Center.

August

I visited the newly-opened Vertis North Mall, another addition to the two malls at North Avenue. Also, I checked out some interesting shops at Vertis North Mall and SM North EDSA.

The following week, I visited Eastwood and Tiendesitas for the first time in a few years, as well as SM City East Ortigas. I also bought my first pair of red socks at a Mumuso branch in Vertis North Mall before heading home.

I also published a throwback post about revisiting Lagro in 2014 for the first time in three years (seven years after the high school graduation in 2007). I celebrated that occasion at a milk tea shop near my high school and posted a note on the shop’s cork board. Later, I had a funny moment when I happened to see a scary looking doll inside a steel cabinet at HMR Fairview Terraces. All I did was picture the doll inside the steel cabinet, and even took a video of me opening the cabinet to reveal the scary looking doll inside, which I uploaded to my Instagram account.

September

I visited Rockwell Center and Century City for the first time in nearly three years, as well as Circuit Makati. Just the usual mall-hopping trip with lots of pictures and some selfies. Later that afternoon, I head to Binondo and saw a wonderful collection of anime figures at the Manga Mania Exhibit (Asian Festival) in Lucky Chinatown Mall.

Around this time, I suddenly become fascinated with Twitter and I’m starting to get the hang of it. Even though I already had a Twitter account since 2010, I never actually used it much except for promoting my blog posts (TWATK-WP and TWATK-Tumblr) and I rarely changed my profile and cover photos. All of a sudden, my Twitter account experienced a revival of all sorts as I started following certain accounts as well as tweeting (and retweeting) posts. This is where you’ll hear me rant about various things, as I don’t feel like doing it on Facebook anymore. Also, I feel more comfortable expressing myself in here than Facebook, to be honest.

I get to visit another event, the Manila International Book Fair at the SMX Convention Center. I actually had to fall in line for about thirty minutes before I finally got inside. There were a lot of people at the event, and there are some interesting booths… though I didn’t buy anything, except for a couple of Mogu Mogu bottles which I consumed outside the premises. I then passed by S’Maison, a two-level luxury mall just below Conrad Manila, as well as SM Mall Of Asia. I get to see the mall’s expansion, though they’re partly open at the moment. The expansion is still a work in progress. After that, I head to Landmark Trinoma to buy some ingredients for a cheesecake.

The next day, I made a no-bake cheesecake, though the result was far from what I expected. It was like an ice cream cake that needs to be refrigerated in order to set. My next attempt is just the same as the first one.

Then came the unexpected sad news. My sister-in-law’s father was killed in an unexpected accident in Sangandaan. He was riding his mountain bike on the way to his destination when a ten-wheeler truck struck him. Although he encountered an accident last year involving another mountain bike and both cyclists ended up getting injured, this one took his life. He was a dedicated cyclist and a loving father to my sister-in-law’s family, as well as to his son-in-law (my brother). I met him a few times and he’s really a nice person. I immediately offer a condolence to my sister-in-law before dinner for her loss. Right now, the case against the truck driver is still ongoing as of this writing. I immediately suffered a momentary depression that I don’t feel like writing and blogging for a while. I resumed blogging and writing a few days after his burial.

October

This month, we’re having a double celebration: my brother and sister-in-law’s first wedding anniversary, and my 27th birthday.

I was planning on celebrating my 27th birthday with a mall-hopping trip in the south (Alabang-Las Piñas area). But before that, I treat myself to a blueberry cheesecake and winter melon milk tea at a dessert place in Lagro. And since my birthday coincided with my brother and sister-in-law’s wedding anniversary, the sumptuous dinner serves as a celebration for two occasions. They bought a cake and a tub of ice cream for my birthday two days later. I managed to finish most of the food in the next few days, except for a few pieces of the sushi roll which was already spoiled just as I was close to finishing them all.

And there’s the second part of the birthday celebration, a mall-hopping trip in the south. That was the time I finally got to wear the black knitted blazer that I bought six months ago. Also, I bought a couple of zipper ties, but I don’t feel like wearing any of them for some reason. I ended up wearing just the olive-yellow collared shirt with the blazer. The trip went okay, but the sudden allergic reaction after running to catch the PNR train and the traffic in Alabang (and later, Commonwealth Avenue, Fairview area) and the rainfall nearly ruined it. Also, the planned concept didn’t go well. The only consolation for this trip is the red and gray socks I bought from a Mumuso branch in Ayala Malls South Park, and the light traffic along Alabang-Zapote Road (Las Piñas section) and CAVITEx.

The month ends in yet another problem. The desktop PC’s motherboard finally gave up after more than eight years. The PC is running slower than usual and it really needs an upgrade. For a while, I’m using my sister-in-law’s laptop, but I’m pretty anxious about retrieving the list of upcoming post titles, which is saved as a sticky note courtesy of a now-defunct freeware ATNotes. I know it is saved on a file, but there’s a possibility that I might no longer retrieve the sticky notes saved on my desktop.

November

It was raining these past few days and I’m starting to feel depressed. I’m already suffering from a case of anxiety due to a lot of reasons (mostly due to the PC’s dead motherboard and the inability to retrieve the upcoming post titles and their schedules), and the gloomy stormy weather makes it even worse. I don’t know what to do, I’m starting to lose focus on my upcoming blog posts. I took a day off from blogging to lure myself out of depression.

I head out on another mall-hopping trip, and I come up with a brilliant idea for my outfit. I finally get to incorporate the black zipper tie to my outfit, which consists of my old orange button shirt, black fleece coat, and a black sun visor. I actually looked good on it so I decided on that outfit. And it yielded a lot of good looking selfies. Anyway, I managed to squeeze a lot of malls within a 12-hour trip, and so far everything went well… until the MRT Ayala Station situation makes it difficult for me to head home. I was forced to take a detour, and it took me long enough just to get home.

The new PC arrived, and it’s running Windows 10. For a while, I’m pretty overwhelmed by its features, and it took me a few weeks in order to get used to it. The old hard drive containing the old OS (Windows 8) is connected to the new motherboard, and we tried to run the old OS. It booted successfully, albeit with a few problems, mostly with the PC’s drivers. And that’s how I eventually managed to retrieve the list of upcoming post titles, along with the rest of the sticky notes and some others. The partition containing the old OS is eventually formatted and is distributed to the remaining partitions on the old hard drive.

The only disappointment though is that the DVD-writer cannot be installed due to lack of SATA slots. So that means I’m going to use my sister-in-law’s laptop in order to retrieve some data from my backup DVDs, as well as burning some important and not-so-important junk into numerous DVDs for the time being in order to save space.

I was thinking of installing ATNotes on the new PC but decided not to and installed Keynote instead. Yup, that freeware I downloaded a long time ago finally got some use as a replacement for ATNotes, which I relied on for a few years. I wouldn’t have to worry about losing the list of upcoming post titles and their schedules again, at least I know where they are saved.

December

I’m off to another mall-hopping trip, focusing on the malls located along LRT-2, plus the mall along Katipunan Avenue. Due to the construction of the LRT-2 extension in the area (Pasig-Cainta-Masinag), I’m stuck in heavy traffic going to SM Masinag and I ended up getting stressed and anxious throughout the trip. I’m planning to skip SM Masinag on my next trip in the area until the LRT-2 extension is finished.

I was planning to relax at the milk tea and coffee place in Lagro, but I did some shopping as well. I actually chose the second Saturday of this month to go out because I was feeling kind of motivated that time, not to mention that My Awesome Classmate’s birthday celebration is taking place on that day. The chance of running into him is pretty low, but if that happens, I can always say “Hi” to him. Anyway, I had a vanilla frappe at the milk tea and coffee place, and I continued writing the story that I started months ago. I then head to the Fairview malls to continue my shopping.

And for the last mall-hopping trip for this year, I chose Manila as my itinerary with a little side trip to the newly-opened Cloverleaf Mall and, supposedly, a mall in Valenzuela. The latter was scrapped due to time constraints and the possible heavy traffic in the area. En route to my first destination, the heavy traffic in Novaliches area is stressing me out, and I spent a couple of hours getting stuck in traffic. Later on, I have to deal with a busy crowd in Divisoria and Binondo. Aside from the mall in Valenzuela, I also skipped a couple of places due to light rain. Reaching Robinsons Place Manila, I’m amazed at the Christmas display featuring a group of children singing Christmas carols. I really enjoyed taking a lot of selfies on the Christmas display, and that totally cheered me up.

For Christmas Eve, I made some cheesecake topped with cashews and crushed graham crackers and a cream cheese carbonara with ham and mushrooms. For New Year’s Eve, we only had spaghetti, French fries, and fried chicken, as well as a plain graham cheesecake. We did celebrate Christmas and New Year with my family and relatives with a simple feast.

Conclusion

The year 2017 is not much like I expected, but it’s pretty remarkable in its own way. I mean, I still had a lot of fun. I visited a couple of events, as well as a lot of malls. I bought a lot of new clothes and some accessories,  posted a lot of pictures on my Instagram account, published a lot of posts on my blog sites, and revived my Twitter account after a long inactivity and started following a lot of accounts (mainly otaku related accounts). And of course, some stormy moments too.

Well, I guess that’s the way it is, you really can’t replicate a previously good year with this one. On a brighter side, however, it was an interesting year for me and a prolific year for my blog sites. I’m looking forward to a better and a brighter 2018 ahead.

The Year 2017: TWATKcox’s Year-End Post Special

Time flies fast, and we’re close to switching to a new year. But before that, let’s have a recap of some of the posts for this year. I featured 30 articles for the year-end post special.

The Holiday Hangover

As the holiday season ends, there’s always a holiday hangover. This post tackles the struggle of switching back to normal after enjoying a lengthy holiday break, as well as some tips on how to overcome your holiday hangover.

The Year 2005: One Remarkable Year (The 150th Post Special)

A lengthy post about the remarkable things that happened in my life during that year. It includes my awesome summer vacation, my sudden interest in watching anime shows, discovering new interests, and my fascination with smooth jazz.

Why I Blog: The TWATKcox’s 4th Year Special

Blogging sure is a great way to express yourself. Anyway, this post tells much about my blogging experience, and why I started blogging. It also includes some snippets from my former blog, the Kin Keihan Times.

Alone For Comfort: A Recluse Inside The Room

I know how it feels like to be a recluse, so I wrote this. It includes my thoughts about being a recluse, as well as some reference from the anime series Welcome To The NHK since the show is basically about the main character Tatsuhiro Satou, who is a hikikomori (a Japanese term for recluse).

Fascination With Night And Darkness

I have this obsession with being surrounded by darkness. I actually discovered the term nyctophilia while I was browsing the internet and I just happened to appreciate the darkness of the night so that’s how I come up with this post.

Comfort Through Darkness (A Thought)

At the same time, I was seeking comfort through the darkness, as a result of being a loner for a very long time. This post explains the reason why I’m lured into the dark side of life.

The Dangers Of [High] Expectations [E]

Having high expectations can be pretty dangerous and disadvantageous to a person, whether in daily life, at school or at work.

The Missing Moments Of My Life

There are some things that I never get to do during high school and college. And so, I decided to recall some activities that I could have done back then, but didn’t.

Goodbye, Student Life (Timeline College Series #18)

The last post in the Timeline College Series focused solely on my college graduation. Coincidentally, it was published five years after my college graduation back in 2012.

My Quirky Ways

I know I’m different from the rest, and I can live with it. This post tells about my non-conformist lifestyle and my unusual creativity, as well as my weird rituals and habits.

Expressions, In Light And Dark: The Six Poems, Written By KCOX [L]

Initially, I was planning to write six stories for this special literary post, but I ended up writing six poems instead. It consists of three light-themed poems and three dark-themed poems.

Fantasies, In Real Life

I wrote this article as a homage to my imaginary fantasies. I admit that I’m still drawn to make-believe fantasies, even though I’m already in my mid-20’s. Well, this post covers everything about my childhood make-believe fantasies and my high level of imagination.

A Cynical Life [E]

Sometimes, I tend to have negative views on life. It’s hard to believe how I can be pessimist and cynical at times, especially when it comes to my future plans and my unfulfilled goals in life. But it isn’t at all bad.

Shyness Is A State Of Mind…

Being a shy person, it’s really difficult for me to accomplish certain tasks and activities such as applying for an OJT on my own, asking a salesman regarding the item on the shelf you’re about to buy or even going to a friend’s house without feeling anxiety. Dealing with shyness really takes a lot of courage and determination to overcome this.

Quirkiness Through Fashion

I usually find myself donning unusual outfits whenever I go out. This post is all about my obsession with unusual but cool looking outfits, as well as providing some ideas for a creative outfit that you can call your own.

Awkwardness Is…

I just couldn’t help feeling awkward in some situations, so I decided to write this post. Anyway, it’s all about socially awkward experiences and how to deal with it.

School Days: Achievements, Activities, Moments, And Experiences / My Thoughts About School And The Importance Of Education

This two-part special post tells about my elementary and high school life, as well as my thoughts and the importance of education. A very timely post for the start of a school year, which actually begins in June.

The Writer With An Attitude (175th Post Special) [E]

The 175th post special focused on my perfectionist attitude as a writer-blogger. Seriously, I always keep proclaiming myself as a perfectionist with an attitude, as if anyone cares. But that should explain who I really am, especially when I’m currently at work with a story or an article.

A Grudge Caused By A Miserable Past [E]

Inspired by a not-so-friendly encounter with my classmates in high school on April Fools’ Day (fourth-year high school classmates, to be more specific), it tells much about holding grudges against the people who made someone’s life miserable, as well as its consequences.

#Throwback: Lagro Revisited

A throwback post about revisiting the place (where my high school is) back in 2014. I was actually heading to a shawarma place but I also decided to pass by my high school, and possibly the street where My Awesome Classmate lives. To be honest, there’s nothing special about this revisit, but I did it anyway.

The Dangers Of Wearing All-Black

Since I started wearing all-black, I tend to become emo at times and I feel kind of strange too. Anyway, this should give you the idea why wearing all-black can be harmful to your emotional well-being.

Keihancarl’s Guide To Budget City Travel

I tend to go out and visit every mall in the metropolis, as well as some places of interest. So here’s a post that will help you manage your time and expenses on every trip, in and out of town.

A Prank Goes Overboard

Not all pranks are funny, that’s why I decided to write this post in order to spread awareness on the consequences of committing unnecessary pranks against an individual or a group of people. Sounds like a killjoy advice coming from a prank victim, but I don’t care.

What It Means To Be Cool (And Look Cool)

The definition of cool can be either good or bad. Being cool is something to be desired, but it can also be a life-changing experience, especially in your lifestyle.

Night Shift

This special post deals with the pros and cons of working the night shift (also known as the graveyard shift), as well as my brief experience as a call center agent in a BPO company in Makati.

The Dangers Of Anxiety [E]

Too much anxiety can be harmful to your well-being. So I wrote this to inform the people about the dangers of extreme anxiety and its negative effects on your physical and emotional well-being.

The Thoughts Of A Person

Sometimes, my thoughts are motivating me to do something. But then, there are times when I was thinking about weird and/or negative thoughts, and that’s something to write about.

Pretty Normal… Not!

I’m not a normal person, that’s for sure. It’s actually similar to My Quirky Ways, but I’m mostly focusing on my mannerisms and strange behavior, which are generally a cause of concern for some.

The Disadvantage Of Spending…

These days, I find myself spending a lot on my mall-hopping trips and some useful and not-so-useful stuff. Well, this post explains the downside of spending money on some expensive or useless stuff, as well as overspending.

A Feast For The Eyes

What good is a feast if the food presentation’s not pleasing enough to the hungry eye? Oh well, this should serve as a guide to those who are planning a sumptuous feast but worried about how it would look like on the table. Just the basics though, since I’m no expert at food preparation.

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It sure was a prolific year for TWATKcox-WP, having published 49 posts (50 including this one), and that’s what I called a great achievement. Anyway, may the next year be as prolific as this one.

From Keihancarl in Manila, we all wish you a HAPPY NEW YEAR! Hooray for 2018!

Night Shift

This post tells much about my brief stint as a call center agent (still in training) in Makati, but I also include some basic information about working the night shift and its pros and cons.


The struggle of having to work at night is real. It’s more than just trying to keep yourself awake and drinking coffee to combat sleepiness, as well as dealing with a lot of stress and some dangers. Welcome to the night shift, also known as the graveyard shift, the nightly equivalent of a typical day job.

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Shift work is an employment practice designed to make use of, or provide service across, all 24 hours of the clock each day of the week.^ So when there’s morning shift, there’s also night shift. In other words, some companies are taking advantage of dividing shifts in order to sustain its round-the-clock operations, particularly in hospitals, police stations, fire stations, broadcast stations, newsrooms, and some business establishments such as BPO companies and convenience stores.

The advantage of working on a night shift is that you don’t need to deal with traffic, as well as the busy crowd of people on the streets. Also, you’re entitled to a time differential pay (the percentage rate, however, depends on the country you’re working in). But it has a lot of disadvantages too, concerning mostly with safety, health, and relationships. For starters, night shift workers are the common target of the bad guys. And then there’s the health risk caused by stress, lack of exercise, unhealthy food and lifestyle (from fast food, caffeine, and smoking), and sleep deprivation (due to the disruption of the body’s circadian rhythm). And at times, you’ll be working on weekends and holidays, meaning less bonding time with your family.

Night owls may have a hard time resetting their body clock, especially if they’re used to it in the long run. It’s like forcing yourself to use a new smartphone without familiarizing yourself with all of its features. Preparing your body for a change in circadian rhythm is necessary in order to avoid problems.

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It was October 2, 2013, when I started my training at a BPO company in Makati. Considering how far my workplace is to my residence in the north, I wouldn’t mind accepting the offer since I badly need a job (well, at least after I was drawn to the booth during a job fair). And since I’m on the graveyard shift, I don’t have to worry about getting stuck in traffic and, at times, I don’t have to worry about missing the last train too (since MRT/LRT operations are until 10:00 PM that time). It only took me about an hour and a half to get there. And of course, since I’m applying as a customer service representative, I need to be prepared as well, both physically and emotionally.

At first, it’s kind of weird to go to work at night, since there are fewer people in the streets and most of the shops are closed… not to mention lack of transportation too. Upon reaching the building (where the training area is), I was a little tired so I took a seat. I almost fall asleep, considering that it’s already past 10:00 when I got there, but someone noticed me and asked if I’m all right. Of course, it feels kind of awkward since I’m not supposed to do that in the workplace, not even in the lobby.

All of the trainees, trainers, and even the security staff are speaking in English. I’m not surprised at all since they’re all supposed to speak in English as most BPOs strictly enforced EOP (English only policy) inside the premises, and this also extends anywhere inside the building, particularly in the elevator and restroom (this only applies to us call center employees).

During the orientation, there are a lot of rules and regulations we trainees are expected to follow. Of course, one of them is we have to speak English at all times, and we’re not allowed to fall asleep during the training and at work (but we’re allowed to stand up and do a few movements in order to combat sleepiness).

Everything went well in my first day of training, but not by the time I got home. I find it difficult to sleep during the day, and I tend to get up just as I was about to fall asleep. At this point, I feel frustrated since I really need to rest up for the following night.

Of course, I also need to comply with the requirements so we were given a day off just to prepare the following documents needed for employment. We also need to undergo the pre-employment medical exam, one of the requirements for employment. That was the time when I actually fainted during a blood test. They checked my blood pressure and it was below normal (below 90/60, I assume). I had to rest for a while until I can finally get up and walk.

A few weeks have passed and I’m starting to adjust to a graveyard shift lifestyle. I’m getting used to the strong smell of coffee and the not-so-bright lighting of the office building, as well as the extremely cold air conditioning and conversations in English. And of course, the sight of trainees watching TV (usually HBO or Star Movies) in the pantry or the lobby. While most of the shops are closed during the night, there are a few dining establishments (fast food chains and convenience stores) open 24/7. Of course, there’s the office pantry, but they’re usually closed on weekends and holidays, so you’ll be relying on fast food a lot (unfortunately). To be honest, I had an aversion for strong coffee as I tend to get jittery after drinking it (with a lot of sugar and some cream), but I really need caffeine to get through the night. So I stick to drinking tea and hot chocolate. Now come to think of it, I even tried having instant arroz caldo on my tumbler, since there’s hot water in the pantry too.

My communication skills are somewhat poor, but I managed to do well during the call simulation, applying what I learned during the training. Of course, there are times when I got nervous and did a lot of mistakes during the call simulation. Eventually, I passed the first part of training, which is the Global Communications Training. I was looking forward to the next part of the training, which is Product Specific Training.

Later on, I started having mixed emotions about continuing my call center training, but I went on anyway. From here on, it’s serious training and we’re supposed to do better at this one. I also get to sit in with some of the call center agents, and learned a few things when it comes to customer service.

And that’s where the stressful part begins, taking calls from customers. I don’t know, but I actually break down after a few calls and one of the coaches helped me calm down. Eventually, I’m getting used to handling irate customers and escalated calls, as well as being calm and cheerful despite having such rough moments. I can really do well in being friendly and respectful to the callers, but there are times when I feel like I’m going to scream and talk back at them for being rude. But of course, we’re not supposed to do that. It’s kind of difficult, to be honest.

Later on, the graveyard shift lifestyle and the stressful life of being a CSR is making me feel even more depressed. Sometimes, I couldn’t wait to finish my shift so I can feel the much-needed relief, yet I still find myself doing the same stressful job every night. Realizing that I wasn’t really happy with my job and I was close to being terminated (mostly due to my tardiness), I asked my coach for a little advice regarding the resignation, and she explained the process. Of course, there’s a possibility of rendering a few more days before I officially quit my job, so I decided to do just that. As soon as I handed my resignation letter, I knew I’m about to head back to being a freeter.

And that’s how my four-month stint at a BPO company ends. At least, I get to experience being a CSR on a graveyard shift. I don’t know if I’ll reconsider applying for the same job again, but then it’s decided that I’m officially done with it. Having experienced the struggles of being a call center agent, I truly had high respect for my friends (including my trainers, coaches, and team leaders) who are still in the industry.

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I don’t know if I’ll ever appreciate this kind of life… I mean, working at nighttime and sleeping at daytime. Sometimes, I enjoy it. Sometimes, I don’t.  Maybe it’s because I find it difficult to adopt a night shift lifestyle. Yes, I may be a night owl in some way, but I’m still a morning person who is struggling with insomnia and falling asleep at bedtime, as well as adjusting my body’s circadian rhythm. I really need to work on resetting my body clock once I finally have a day job.

Then again, maybe I’m still open to working the night shift, but I don’t think I’ll be able to enjoy the daytime activities I loved the most. What a compromise. Well, this kind of lifestyle isn’t really suitable for me after all. Who knows, this kind of thinking might change… probably in a few years or so.

The Writer With An Attitude (175th Post Special) [E]

For TWATKcox’s 175th post, it’s all about the unusual attitude of a weirdo named Keihancarl Oikou Xiaucham as a writer-blogger. In case you didn’t know who Keihancarl is, then try to figure out yourself. Yes, that would be me, the one who’s solely responsible for writing articles and stories, as well as maintaining this blog you’re reading right now.


My name is Keihancarl Oikou Xiaucham, the writer with an attitude. A writer who hates to be interrupted while writing a series of posts. A perfectionist with a certain dislike for anything below my standards. A fashionable guy who loves red, black, and gray. Makes sense, right?

As a writer, I’m mostly drawn to dark themed stories, dealing with angst, violence, personal grudge, depression… anything that can evoke a reader’s mind. But of course, I don’t limit myself to writing such stories. I can write comedy if I have to. But I’m not the kind of person who loves cracking jokes, so don’t expect.

Anyway, I’ve been covering light and [slightly] emotional topics since I started blogging. In the last few years, I also published a few explicit posts, as well as identifying myself as the writer with an attitude. So it’s time to live up to that.

Yes, I’m being nice. But I can be critical and straightforward. depending on a situation. I can call you a bunch of names, I can even write all about the evil things I did to a person or a group of people… indirectly, of course, as I don’t want to get sued for defamation. Freedom of speech has its limitations, in case you didn’t know.

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In order to gather ideas, I need to get out of the house and endure a tiring afternoon of walking and visiting various places… mostly malls, famous landmarks, and small cafés near my high school. I can get lots of ideas from seeing people, checking some of the books at a second-hand bookstore, going to an event, and a few interesting sights around the city. Experience is the most important factor in writing a post… and I don’t mean writing experiences. Keep that in mind.

Of course, I have my smartphone with me, mainly for Facebook and Instagram, and some picture taking. At times, I write down my ideas and possible snippets for an article or story I was writing, but I didn’t utilize it’s potential… despite being a smartphone user for more than three years. Yes, I treat my smartphone as my portable PC, but I don’t do blog writing with it. You know how some telcos are making profits with their crappy service and slow internet connection, right?

At home, I translate these thoughts into writing. But most of the time, these thoughts came to nothing, and I end up with a lot of drafts and snippets which don’t end up as a complete article or a story. They’re stored on my PC for a long period of time and are rarely opened and read. That’s the beauty of a writer’s block, isn’t it?

Normally, I only do most of my writing work during afternoons and late nights (sometimes extending up to the wee hours of the morning). Dark-themed stories and articles are always done in the wee hours of the morning since that’s the only time I can concentrate without any interruptions, but I still can’t write anything since I’m currently working on a PC right behind the TV cabinet and across the dining area. Since it’s an open space, there’s no privacy so I can’t assume that there’ll be no interruption while I’m working.

I hate seeing people lurking behind my back and making unnecessary comments while I’m working. These people are the main reason why I tend to lose concentration in the article/story being written and end up procrastinating. Mark my words, if ever I become famous, I might throw the keyboard at them to shut them up and go away. Of course, writing stories and articles is like creating an artwork. I had to make sure that I’m in a cheerful mood when I’m writing something, especially dark-themed stories and articles. Otherwise, I’ll lose concentration and may lead to procrastination.

You certainly knew how long it takes for me to finish a single article? These take a minimum of 12 hours to a few days, sometimes weeks, or may take a few months. Maybe a year. As of this writing, I somehow manage to finish a lot of articles within a month or two. But sometimes, I resort to writing really short ones (up to a maximum of 150 words). These articles are categorized as the i150W series, short for In 150 Words, which I consider as a series of filler posts in case I don’t have a finished article ready to be published at a certain date. Yup, I schedule my posts so I don’t have to publish two articles within a 24-hour period.

I am a frustrated writer with a writer’s block. I can’t even concentrate on what I’m doing due to a variety unnecessary interruptions. Whatever. I’ll just keep up this attitude of mine until I accomplish a lot of things.

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My life, as a writer and a blogger… Right now, I’m enjoying what I’m doing, provided that I don’t get interrupted in the middle of writing an article or a story. That I don’t get distracted by checking my Facebook or Instagram, or some websites about something that piqued my curiosity. And of course, I don’t need to be told about some random nonsense. In short, don’t disturb me while I’m writing.

I don’t know if there are writers who are annoyed by such disturbances while writing their literary masterpieces. But I’m pretty sure that they’re not the kind of people who would delay their work if they’re not in the mood since they’re likely to get pressured by their publishers. Oh well, if I become one, then I’ll need to practice restraint. Besides, being a writer requires a great deal of discipline, and that includes refinement of your behavior. Whatever. I’ll do what I can to finish a story I’m working on.